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Training is Finished, emotions are everywhere

I love Siem Reap so much

So the soul purpose of me coming to Siem Reap was to complete my Yoga training, it has been absolutely incredible, everything is amazing and I have fallen in love with Siem Reap. I had a few purposes of coming here and a week or so into training I realised that this is not something that is just going to take a few weeks, I need a lot more time than I imagined. Over the course of the training everything was set and planned for the days, I hate structure and routine but I have found myself a little lost over the last few days. It is the 24th now and I have been in my new hotel for 4 nights, this is my 4th day since Yoga training has finished but strangely I feel like this is the first day that I have actually been able to relax. Saturday I went to Yoga at 6.30am, spent the morning in a cafe, had a massage and then chilled with Laura. Saturday night we went to the circus which was absolutely incredible, and well worth the money and then we celebrated Michele’s birthday and it was a bit of a messy one, a bottle got knocked over and cut my leg, and it wasn;t me either hahaha, so throughout training I have knocked over numerous amounts of drink bottles and we cannot forget the green smoothie kick hahahhaha. I had a bit of a hangover the next day, so the day was a bit of a write off. Although I did enjoy a lovely dinner with Vicky and Laura, and then a cheeky massage at our favourite spot. Yesterday we went to Angkor Wat, which was awesome. We decided to cycle which was such a good idea, but I must admit it was a super super hot one. We went the wrong way and at the check point we got turned around,I thought he was pulling a fast one on us but he wasn’t, so we had to cycle 4-5 km back to get our tickets from the ticket office, during that time there was a bike guide with a family who decided to stop in the middle of the road, I swerved around them, but Laura hahahha she got hit by the young boy, he cycled straight into her and didn’t even attempt to stop, omg it was soooo funny. The roads are crazy here, we had so much fun cycling along them, weaving in and out of traffic and Laura’s little scream to move them out of the way was too funny. I was sooo hot that I had my top rolled up and belly hanging out, I wouldn’t have done this previously but I am at the point where I am happy with who I am, I just love the locals response, the ladies look and give a little ohhhhh and a smile. It was so nice just to pass so many locals, say hi, smile and joke with them. They are such beautiful people. We arrived at Angkor Wat, it was exactly how I imagined and to what I have seen in pictures. The lake surrounding the temples was so beautiful, along with all the green trees, the huge ancient temples, it truly was a beautiful sight. What I really likes is how locals were just sat chilling on the grass by the lake. Entering our first temple, it was quick we both realised we are not a fan of so many tourists being around, we saw some Monks giving blessings so of course I got one, these Monks were happy and it was soooo nice to see as we were only taking an hour before about how they don’t look happy. We explored a bit more, I wasn’t allowed in one bit as I had a scarf covering my shoulders not a T-Shirt so I decided to sit and chill and Laura headed on up. I spent the time sat there in silence and meditated, it felt sooo peaceful and I think I am now getting to grips with mediation without guidance. We were heading out and I saw some grass, I don’t know why but I got excited so we went that way, ewe climbed down these steep ancient steps made of mismatched rocks, and then back up another lot. It was sooooo tranquil, Laura sat on one ledge and I sat on another, we ended up just sat there in silence enjoying the space, quietness and calm. I sat there with my eyes closed, I could hear the birds chirping away, different to what I have heard before, when we first got in there, they seemed very angry, but that soon changed to nice chirping, I could feel calmness, in the background I could hear random voices from the other part of the temple but it stayed as a background noise. It was lovely to just sit and soak in the environment and energy. One thing I noticed is plants coming out of the high bits of the temple, how did they get there I wondered, the world is truly amazing, and it was nice to just stop and admire, especially after the tough 3 weeks we have just had. The cycle home was lovely, we went through a different route, we saw a lot of locals in their homes, homeshops etc, I witnessed chickens sat on a chair, kids playing under a mat, 4 cute little boys sat on the back of a truck, no older than 5 just sat eating snacks while being driven along, I love to just cycle along and look at the surroundings, they live so differently out I find it fascinating, and it really does open up your mind and thoughts to your own life and society back home. I have been unsure how long I was going to stay here for, my original plan was to have a few days here after training, then head back to Bangkok for a few days, and then head to Bali 2 days earlier than when the girls arrive. Over the last week I have been going backwards and forwards in my head as to when I will leave, most people have left now, I have realised that I haven’t really had any alone time at all, and that maybe I should have a couple of days. Don’t get me wrong I have loved every minute with people here, I have met some incredible people here, but being alone today has had me feeling a bit confused as to am I ok being alone, is it that I am tired, is it because the last few weeks have been overwhelming, I am honestly not sure at all. What I do know is just writing this helps, Xmas is never really a good time for me and actually as I write this maybe that is what it is, I have not really thought about it much as it doesn’t feel like Xmas here, but going on social media a little has maybe made me think about it. I am not going to be alone though as Ali and Vicky are here. So I have booked my hotel room for another two nights and will leave on the 26th. People said I should leave, but I like it here, I am comfortable and being here for Xmas is probably a good idea. The flights I have been looking at for going back to Bangkok and then Bali have not planned out right so I think I am going to have to do a connection in Kuala Lumpar. Anyway enough of me babbling along. I do have a lot of work, studying and planning to do over the next few weeks, and I also want to plan some structure for my return to the UK.

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